Tuesday, April 21, 2009

The things I learned in Geology class tonight:

1. My professor apparently likes Paris Hilton. I tried not to jump up and knock some sense into him when he shrugged and said "She's blonde and cute. What can I say?" Does the man have eyes? Paris Hilton is so not cute. Puppies are cute. Babies are cute. The wrinkles next to George Clooney's eyes when he smiles is cute. Paris Hilton is....none of those things.

2. I found out where the term "dead ringer" came from. When people died, they'd place a string inside of their coffin and attach it to a bell that was next to their headstone. This way, if they really weren't dead and were instead..oh, I dunno, taking a power nap or something, and they happened to wake up buried 6 feet underground, hopefully they'd have the foresight to search for that string and ring the bell repeatedly until somebody happened to walk by and realize there was a live person inside. Neat idea I guess, although it makes me think two things. One: the idea that they buried enough live people to have a need for this is a bit unnerving. And two: I'd hate to be walking through those graveyards on a windy night. Also, this doesn't really explain to me why we use the term the way we do. Next time I see a "dead ringer" for my sister, I'll be sure to bury the lady in a coffin and see if she can indeed manage to ring the bell to let us know she's alive.

3. When you're writing on a white board, you really should make sure you've been working on your handwriting. Otherwise words like "rock" will end up looking like "cock" and have the whole class thinking you have a side-job teaching Pornography 101.

4. My professor had popcorn ceilings in his apartment when he was in college. Don't ask me why I needed to know this. I still haven't figured that out.

5. Spider poop (aka a spiderweb) on a projector lens is approximately 1 pixel. You don't want to know how this came up. Trust me.

So that was our class for the evening. Oh, there was also some stuff about rocks and weatherization, but who listens to that stuff really?

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