All the reasons that my hair sucks ass

My hair is really thick. Sometimes I like that it's so thick. I mean, everybody wants thick hair, right? The problem is, my hair is also very, very fine so it doesn't actually LOOK anywhere near as thick as it is. The only time anybody realizes how thick my hair is, is if they're cutting it or dying it for me. And they always act so shocked about it.

Having thick hair sucks in so many ways. For instance, it takes hours and hours for my hair to completely dry. Why don't I use a blow dryer? Well, that would be awesome if it didn't create frizzy, fly-away, staticky hair on top of my head. Having thick hair also means that in the summer, my head sweats like it's being interrogated by the FBI. And for me, sweaty scalp=itchy scalp. Which creates knotty, frizzy, fly-away hair on top of my head. Sure, it's nice to be able to go outside without a hat on when it's 20 below, but you know, I actually enjoy crocheting hats and they only take me about 2 hours to make so I have a lot of them. I'd settle for hair that's a little bit thinner, and cute hats in the winter.

What fine hair means is that it tangles easily. I could seriously brush my hair for an hour, get every single last tangle out, have it looking all smooth and shiny. But 5 minutes later I guarantee it will be in knots again and look like I haven't brushed it all day. It likes to wait until I've walked away from every brush in existence. Once there are no brushes in sight, the chief yells "OK troops! Deploy!" and they all embrace as if they're saying their last goodbye.

I used to always say my hair was so straight you could hear it cry when I'd wrap it around a curling iron. As I've gotten older, I've noticed there's some body to my hair. It's not enough to call it curly, or to use any of those "curl-enhancer" products to create cute little waves. It's just enough to make it turn frizzy on me when I brush it out.

Keeping the balance of oily vs. dry is so tricky with my hair. The only time I think my hair looks good is the day I wash it, but if I wash it every day it gets very dry and brittle. Even washing it every other day eventually makes it dry. So, for me, it's every 3 days because by day 3 it will start looking oily.

One good thing I will say about my hair is that it usually grows pretty quickly. That's nice when I'm trying to grow it out, like I am right now. But about a year ago I decided to cut some of my bangs short and I get really tired of having to trim them every 3 weeks to keep them out of my eyes. Of course, the minute I decide to grow them out they'll start growing as slowly as they possibly can.

I've been dying my hair since I was 12 years old. I think it's decided to rebel. I really can't stand my natural color, which used to be a mousey boring brown but is now sprinkled with greyish-white strands. I wonder sometimes if I stopped dying it and let it grow out naturally, if the mousey brown color might get some natural highlights in it, but now that the grey keeps sprouting up, I sure don't plan to ever find out.

Does it sound like I'm bitching and complaining? Well good, because I am. I often think about shaving my head but I worry that under all of this unmanageable, fine, thick, frizzy, mousey-brown hair, my head may be misshapen. It wouldn't surprise me. Lord knows I've taken enough bumps to the head.

Ah well. Make due with what we have, right? Guess I'll go wash this "blonde" dye out even though it doesn't appear to have worked in the slightest. Maybe I can still get the pink to look good.